The urns were delivered Wednesday night and they are beautiful. Solid cherry, with hand carved celtic letters and knots. Each has two compartments: one for the remains and one for keepsakes. Many thanks to Wood Creations for their lovely gifts of time and talent, helping us to honor David and his remains.
Mark, Catharine, and Stephen came over late last night to see them and we talked into the wee hours. The boys told stories I'd never heard before and we cried and talked about how lucky we are to have each other and to know that David had a good relationship with each of his family members when he died. None of us has regrets or has to say, "I wish we'd made up after that fight," or "I sure hope he knew how much I loved him", or anything like that. We were all at peace with David. What a blessing. So many people suffer regrets that make bereavement more difficult and tormented when a sudden loss of a loved one is accompanied by unfinished business in their relationships. Mark was the one last night to remind me of this and it really was comfort for the day. He said, "Mom, do you realize how lucky we are?" He's right. We also talked about how David is now free from his demons. God gave David the miraculous healing he needed most. It's going to be a long time before we are with David again, but now he is free.
And he can see everything clearly that we can't, and he's in a place where he can look out for us. Stephen was talking the other day about how he often feels David close to him. Sometimes he is sure David is trying to let him know he's close- little things that David would know would be meaningful to Stephen, things that happen in just such a way...
So today I took the urns to the crematory and they transferred D's remains for me. I was able to do that with surprisingly little emotion.
Then this evening I got an email from the man who received David's heart. It was a sweet, to the point message, and he wants to meet our family. I had asked God for this.
I've made it through another week. There have been tears and smiles, reasons to be grateful, and to give thanks. There's been enough mercy.
On the morning of Nov. 2, 2009 my sweet son David suffered a major brain aneurysm. He died on November 14. This page was created by me, David's mom, as a therapy for working through grief and for staying connected to the many friends who have carried David's family through our great loss. For those who wish to read the beginning of David's story, a daily account from MCV while his doctors and nurses fought to save him, it may still be found at www.caringbridge.org/visit/davidfetty.
Posts
